Yes, I know there are a million of you out there that have this album and have played the crap out of it. I have no doubt that there are a few people out there that have never had the pleasure of listening to Mer De Noms. This one is for those unfortunate few that have never heard this gem and for those millions upon millions who could stand to revisit classics like “The Hollow” and “3 Libras”.
Mer De Noms came out in March of 2000, not exactly a banner year for music. At the age of 16, I was a wise old sage. (Korn = good. Limp Bizkit = not quite as good. Coal Chamber = totally flippin sweet.) I bought the album the week it came out but for some odd reason, it just sat in the shrink wrap on top of my dresser for two months. Later, I would look at it with a puzzled expression and ask “Who are these guys? They’re not one of the three bands that I think are awesome. Why should I listen to them?”
“BECAUSE THIS IS DAMN GOOD MUSIC. WAY THE FUCK BETTER THAN COAL CHAMBER.” bellowed the APC album.
“Funny, I wasn’t aware that a lone CD sitting atop my dresser could speak.” said the sage.
“IT CAN’T. YOUR BRAIN IS SUFFERING A MASSIVE LACK OF OXYGEN FROM ALL OF THE STINK EMINATING FROM YOUR STEREO. YOU’RE HALLUCINATING. CHECK IT OUT. WAVE YOUR HAND IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE. SEE THE TRAILS?”
“That’s awesome! WHOA!!! HAHAHAHAHA!”
“PAY ATTENTION. YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO BETTER MUSIC BECAUSE THIS STUFF IS DESTROYING YOUR BRAIN.”
“Prove it.”
“LOOK, YOU USED TO HAVE A VOCABULARY OF ABOUT 200 WORDS. NOW IT’S ABOUT HALF THAT AND THE ONES YOU HAVE LEFT CONSIST OF GEORGE CARLIN’S SEVEN DIRTY WORDS AND THE 93 WORDS THAT YOU HAVE FOR BOOBS.”
“Boobs?”
“SEE WHAT I MEAN? GO OPEN A WINDOW AND TURN ON SOME PERFECT CIRCLE. HOPEFULLY YOU’LL BE ABLE TO STRING TOGETHER A COHERANT SENTENCE BY THE TIME YOU GET OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL.”
“….boobs?”
I don’t remember what happened next, but when I woke up there was a delightful breeze coming in from an open window and my trusty boom box was nearing the end of “Thinking of You”. It was the dawn of a new period of music for me. I won’t say that everything I listened to from there on out was a masterpiece, but I was beginning to develop a taste for something beyond the status quo. Thanks, APC.
You bought it because I told you to. You're welcome. :P
Posted by: Kendra | 11/12/2011 at 08:09 AM
And APC is what got me to start liking Tool. Double thank you.
Posted by: Jeff Higgins | 11/12/2011 at 08:15 AM
Saw them open for NIN in Atlanta...on my birthday. I was wearing a Cobra (as in g-joe's nemesis) shirt. Mer de Moms had only been out a week. But I loved every song they played. Did NOT care for Maynard's wig. He looked like Mary Magdalene. Oooooh now I get it.
Posted by: andy | 11/12/2011 at 11:46 AM
Need I curse auto-correct?
Posted by: andy | 11/12/2011 at 11:47 AM